pez: (Karupin - Unimpressed)
[personal profile] pez
You guys must all be busy out there having lives. Which leaves me and the poor unloved internet to comfort each other in our loneliness.

My mum sent me towels. They're ugly but they seem soft!

Tesco has been ever so helpful. They informed me, on the packaging of their roasted pistachios in shells, that this product contains pistachios. Great allergy advice, very very important *sage nod of approval*. It also cautioned me that I should remove them from shells before consumption.

Why "consumption", anyway? Why not "eating"? Why does Stratford station tell people that "surfaces may have become slippery due to the adverse weather conditions" instead of "it's been raining, the floor may be wet and slippery"? I know I have said this before, but despite all those "plain English" movements that pop up here and there, the situation is not getting any better.

However! The other day in a meeting at a London Borough, I was told that they now have to use day-to-day English that everyone else uses. So, "framework" becomes "partnership", "stakeholders" becomes "affected residents and businesses", etc. I was delighted. There is hope yet...?

Date: 2008-01-25 02:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yuki-scorpio.livejournal.com
My sincere apologies, your use of language appears to be too uncomplicated and I must request that you make use of more words so that I may fully comprehend what you are attempting to convey. &organ-which-pumps-blood-around;

Date: 2008-01-25 02:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] impressioniste.livejournal.com
So sorry, what I meant to say was:

Do not experience undue feelings of anxiety and distress, because I will always be omnipresent to supply you with your requisite daily amount of vulgarity and inanity.

ColonEndParentheses

Date: 2008-01-25 03:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yuki-scorpio.livejournal.com
Ah, I comprehend now. What you have said above is much clearer than it was previously! My gratitude to your contribution towards the interestingness of the World Wide Web.

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