I weep.

[pez]

Idiot Gap Year Student: The roadmarkings for this roundabout doesn't work. [lane weaving and driver confusion stuff]

Me: But people don't drive like the way you just described. (And I've been on this project for two years. Don't just look at two arms of the roundabout for 30 seconds and then say it doesn't work.)

IGYS: But if they choose this lane and try to go there and then people on that lane... [blah blah]

Me: That's why at that section there are no markings. It's for the weaving. [further explanation]

IGYS: But I'd just pick the lane depending on which has least traffic... well I guess I do treat roundabouts like dual-lane carriageways.

Me: Exactly. People don't treat roundabouts like regular carriageways. They use the left hand lane when they need to take the next exit, not when that lane has least cars on it and then change back into an inner lane just before the exit. You drive like a maniac. I've been in your car. It was like taking my life into my own hands. (? I think I meant a great risk to my life.)

Coworkers: What on earth is that about?

IGYS: She didn't like it that I had a hand off the wheel at one point...

Me: You had both hands off the wheel at 40mph just off the high street at Coggeshall whilst struggling to take two jackets off at the same time.

Coworkers: WHOA!

IGYS: But I'm sure I had my knee on the wheel!

Me: Like that's gonna help when something jumps out in front of you.

IGYS: *grumble* But I'm sure I can...

Coworkers: Yeah, tell that to the judge after you've killed someone.

IGYS: *grumble some more*

Me: (Please give me better minions.)

Comments

[storme]

Everyone needs better minions. Or more of the good ones. *nod*

[yuki-scorpio.livejournal.com]

More Stormes? *hopeful look*

[storme]

I'm not sure the world could cope with more of me.

[yuki-scorpio.livejournal.com]

Nothing I can't do with a whistle and a loud voice!

Pez: *blows whistle* Line up!
Stormes: *stand in a line like good soldiers*

......okay maybe only in my imagination. No, I think one of you is quite enough, and I don't mean this in a bad way. XD

[storme]

I don't think a group of me would be able to form a neat formation. :P

There can only be one!

[yuki-scorpio.livejournal.com]

But which formation are we talking about? The Arrow of Athlum or...? :P

[storme]

I can just *sense* a Rear Assault comment impending here.

(I am browsing formations. Hmmm. I am sort of partial to a decent Wave Crest, really.)

[yuki-scorpio.livejournal.com]

All that does is make me imagine a line of MiniDaves doing a Mexican wave!

[storme]

Oooh, imagine the cute.

It would pan to the end and there would be Torgal, all arms folded, refusing to participate.

[yuki-scorpio.livejournal.com]

Torgal would be subject to the wibbling of a whole line of MiniDaves. Would he be able to withstand such onslaught?

[storme]

Torgal: Lord David, I really think--

Dave: *wibble*

Torgal: *sigh*

Dave: *pout*

Torgal: *waves all arms in the air unenthusiastically for a moment* Woo.

Dave: Eee! Yay! Again, again!

Torgal: *even heavier sigh*

[yuki-scorpio.livejournal.com]

It's his fault for having so many arms, which makes him a prime Mexican wave target!

[storme]

I'm just imagining Allan's reaction to it.

(Allan would give into the Dave also eventually. But he'd still mock Torgal for doing so.)

[yuki-scorpio.livejournal.com]

They should just follow Leucetius's example and do exactly as Dave tells them to.

[storme]

Leucetius would be there, with pompoms and an Athlum tunic, leading the wave personally. :)

[yuki-scorpio.livejournal.com]

He started off being so afraid of the Dave, but in fact he's just another Dave fanboy in the making.

[storme]

Everyone loves the Dave! He is just *that* pretty.

[yuki-scorpio.livejournal.com]

One of the generals' daily tasks is sorting out all the fanmail their lord gets.

[storme]

Another task is stopping Rush from seeing the stack of marriage proposals. ;)

[yuki-scorpio.livejournal.com]

Poor Rush, those would make him feel all insecure.

[storme]

Especially since another task is to stop Rush seeing any of his own fanmail. Dave doesn't want him getting distracted, is all. :P

[kedi-kedi.livejournal.com]

*shakes head*

Is this person a driver? I bloody well hope not! O.o

[yuki-scorpio.livejournal.com]

He is. I'm not getting in his car ever again.

[yuki-scorpio.livejournal.com]

God knows what sort of visistone recordings and personal items these fans send...

[kedi-kedi.livejournal.com]

Dear god......maybe someone needs to revoke his license if he thinks people drive the way he does O.o

[storme]

Exactly. Dave can't have Rush's innocent mind corrupted--he's keeping an eye on Rush for the Sykes, after all.

[lechaco.livejournal.com]

LOL Geez driving with the knees is so unsafe. WTF IGYS. >:(

[semishade (from livejournal.com)]

I have better minions and I'm not sharing!

[yuki-scorpio.livejournal.com]

>(!

[yuki-scorpio.livejournal.com]

:(((( I don't want to be in his car again. EVER.

[uminohikari.livejournal.com]

...aren't you supposed to crush the spirit of your minions so they don't disagree with you? *confused~*