Once I was giving a male friend a massage because he had a bad sunburn and needed to apply cooling lotion every night to his back (he couldn't reach it), so we got home around 2 AM from watching a play in the city and he put on his pajama pants, undressed his shirt and laid (belly down), while I (who was in my pajamas with my top completely open (you know those buttoned pajama tops) and was rubbing on the lotion.
The doorbell rang and it was a huge cop (think Homer Simpson) and this was the dialogue:
Me - Can I help you officer? Cop - Err.... (looking at me, with my pajama unbottoned and a greasy fluid on my hands) I got a complaint about the noise. Friend - That's my wacky neighbor she always calls the police whenever she listens to me getting home late. (still belly down in bed, without his top and with his gleaming back from the lotion on my head) Cop - You know *stutters* she said you boys were making lots of noise *more stutter* but I've been here for fifteen minutes and haven't heard a thing, I swear to God. Me - Well, yeah, we know, she always does this. Cop - I'll tell you what, (stutters some more) you boys keep on doing whatever you were doing and I'll be on my way. Me - Bye officer.
So when I closed the door and looked at my lotioned hand, it hit me what the cop was thinking all along. I laughed hysterically for 2 whole hours.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2008-01-14 10:57 pm (UTC)The doorbell rang and it was a huge cop (think Homer Simpson) and this was the dialogue:
Me - Can I help you officer?
Cop - Err.... (looking at me, with my pajama unbottoned and a greasy fluid on my hands) I got a complaint about the noise.
Friend - That's my wacky neighbor she always calls the police whenever she listens to me getting home late. (still belly down in bed, without his top and with his gleaming back from the lotion on my head)
Cop - You know *stutters* she said you boys were making lots of noise *more stutter* but I've been here for fifteen minutes and haven't heard a thing, I swear to God.
Me - Well, yeah, we know, she always does this.
Cop - I'll tell you what, (stutters some more) you boys keep on doing whatever you were doing and I'll be on my way.
Me - Bye officer.
So when I closed the door and looked at my lotioned hand, it hit me what the cop was thinking all along. I laughed hysterically for 2 whole hours.
True story.